My very worst moment as Madeline Elaine's mother came when she was about 8 months old. We lived in a small house that had some sort of flying rodent portal. We got at least 2 or 3 bats in the house a month. I am terrified of bats, paralyzing, can't make my brain function, terrified. Once, Duffy was out of town for the weekend and a bat got into the house. I barricaded myself into the bedroom with Madeline and the dogs. After an hour, I realized we wouldn't be able to stay in there for 2 more days. I called the police and they were kind enough to come save me.
So, Madeline was 8 months old and happily fingerpainting in her high chair. Duffy and I were folding laundry in the bedroom, it was the MIDDLE OF THE DAY, AND A BAT CAME SWOOPING OUT OF THE BASEMENT. Duffy ran to get the broom, and I ran for any other room in the house. The bat followed. It swooped past me into the dining room, over Maddy's head. She was completely oblivious and happily slapping paint everywhere. I wanted to go get her and cover her from the rabid vampire bat, but my feet wouldn't move, so I stood there on the steps until the bat flew out of the room and then I ran to get her.
That was a very long time ago, and I'm still ashamed. However, I am pleased to report that I have now successfully eradicated that incident as my worst moment as Madeline's mother.
Saturday, at about 3:30pm, Madeline's little dog Sally was following me around with the "I need to go outside right now. Take me or I'll pee on the freshly shampooed carpet," look on her face. I opened the door to the backyard and let her out, unsupervised. She is so bonded to us that she never runs away like Banks. She's always quick to come and scratch at the door to get back in. Except when one forgets that she's outside for 2 and a half hours. Then she gets out and wanders all over creation, until a neighbor takes pity on her and takes her inside to cool off, and then since she doesn't have a collar on (because she'd just gotten a bath) calls the dogcatcher who takes her to the pound, and shuts her into the chain link and concrete cage where she'll spend the rest of the weekend.
So I'll be going to rescue Sally on Monday. And Maddy will be relieved. I was relieved when we discovered where she was. I can't imagine what Maddy and I would have done if I'd lost her forever. She was heartbroken when we didn't know, and she was sad today. Sally follows the girls everywhere. They dress her up and give her baths. She sleeps with them at night. First one and then the other. She splits her time evenly. I found her several mornings ago under Abbey's feet. She was wide awake but laying contendly at the foot of her bed, and Abbey had her feet propped up on Sally, and was sound asleep. Sally didn't move until Abbey got up. She is a great little kid pet, and I nearly lost her.
So now, I know myself as the mom who nearly lost the children's beloved pet, and not just the mom who nearly let her daughter be eaten by the evil bat. I am a woman of many talents.
So, Madeline was 8 months old and happily fingerpainting in her high chair. Duffy and I were folding laundry in the bedroom, it was the MIDDLE OF THE DAY, AND A BAT CAME SWOOPING OUT OF THE BASEMENT. Duffy ran to get the broom, and I ran for any other room in the house. The bat followed. It swooped past me into the dining room, over Maddy's head. She was completely oblivious and happily slapping paint everywhere. I wanted to go get her and cover her from the rabid vampire bat, but my feet wouldn't move, so I stood there on the steps until the bat flew out of the room and then I ran to get her.
That was a very long time ago, and I'm still ashamed. However, I am pleased to report that I have now successfully eradicated that incident as my worst moment as Madeline's mother.
Saturday, at about 3:30pm, Madeline's little dog Sally was following me around with the "I need to go outside right now. Take me or I'll pee on the freshly shampooed carpet," look on her face. I opened the door to the backyard and let her out, unsupervised. She is so bonded to us that she never runs away like Banks. She's always quick to come and scratch at the door to get back in. Except when one forgets that she's outside for 2 and a half hours. Then she gets out and wanders all over creation, until a neighbor takes pity on her and takes her inside to cool off, and then since she doesn't have a collar on (because she'd just gotten a bath) calls the dogcatcher who takes her to the pound, and shuts her into the chain link and concrete cage where she'll spend the rest of the weekend.
So I'll be going to rescue Sally on Monday. And Maddy will be relieved. I was relieved when we discovered where she was. I can't imagine what Maddy and I would have done if I'd lost her forever. She was heartbroken when we didn't know, and she was sad today. Sally follows the girls everywhere. They dress her up and give her baths. She sleeps with them at night. First one and then the other. She splits her time evenly. I found her several mornings ago under Abbey's feet. She was wide awake but laying contendly at the foot of her bed, and Abbey had her feet propped up on Sally, and was sound asleep. Sally didn't move until Abbey got up. She is a great little kid pet, and I nearly lost her.
So now, I know myself as the mom who nearly lost the children's beloved pet, and not just the mom who nearly let her daughter be eaten by the evil bat. I am a woman of many talents.
Oh Niki, you are indeed the best mother ever! Those are things that you will look back on in 20 years and laugh. :) I had a little dog growing up that was about the size of Sally, and she would get out about once a week and decide to go dodge traffic outside of our house on a SUPER BUSY 4 LANE street in KC. I think she had to have been born with 100 lives. I totally understand. And then there was this time when our house was infested with a family of mice, and Taylor was probably 7 or 8 months old, just started crawling by the way, and she found a dead mouse that must have eaten some poison we set out for it, and little Miss Taylor proceeded to EAT THE MOUSE! I found her a few minutes later with the tail in her mouth! I about died! So just remember, we all have once been a part of the "worst mother of the year" club. :)
ReplyDeleteKerri
You are a fantastic mother who did not stop looking for Sally until she was found. You were also a smart mom to enlist the help of others to look for her.
ReplyDeleteErica
Oh Niki! You are a woman of many many talents. I'm sorry but I had to laugh a little! Only because I already knew Sally was safe and I've heard you tell the bat story. :)
ReplyDeleteHolly
:) I'm with Holly. And OMG KERRI!!!!! SHE ATE THE MOUSE?!?!?!!????? *vomits*
ReplyDelete