Dear Isabelle,
Hello my sweet. It has been a long 8 months since I last held you. It seems like forever, and a minute all at once. I can picture you in my mind as you were, and as I imagine you are now in Heaven.
It's terribly cold now and snowy, and it seems like no matter how often I go to clear off your name marker, it's always covered in frost and snow. People still manage to find you though and leave things for you so that you know how much you are loved and remembered. Or maybe they do it for us, so that we know we aren't alone in our grief.
Maddy wrote a story about you in school. She wrote about your birth and how excited she was to be a big sister again. It was beautifully written and illustrated. You'd be so amazed by her dancing and how entertaining and charming she is.
Abbey named her new American Girl Doll Isabelle. It's hard sometimes to her your name, but I think it makes her feel connected to you, so I bite my lip to keep from crying. She tells me that she misses you. I picked out her big sister shirt for her to wear to school, but she wouldn't wear it, and I didn't push. She was so proud of that shirt. She was so proud to be your sister, I'm sorry you two didn't get more time together.
Mommy and Daddy are working hard to get things ready for your birthday. More than 100 people have pledged to give blood for your birthday. Dancing Elmos and talking teapots would have been better I know, but I don't have Heaven's mailing addess. I think I will buy your presents anyway.
Daddy wears his pink shirts every Thursday, and now he wears pink whenever he needs you with him. He wore pink to Abbey's first tumbling meet so that you would be there too. His heart is broken and I don't know if it will ever be whole again.
I miss you. Every breath and every step. I think of you often and in everything I do. I try so hard to make your memory a happy one. I tell everyone that I owe it to you to make your life count. Maddy and Abbey will grow up and make their mark on this world in their own time and their own way. You had such a short time, it's my job to make your mark, and carry on the work that your life started. I hope I make you proud. I hope I'm doing this right. I hope that Team Izzy makes a difference, and makes your mark on the world a big one.
I love you my girl. I read the Itsy Bitsy Spider to you this morning, I hope it made you smile.
Always,
Mommy
Hello my sweet. It has been a long 8 months since I last held you. It seems like forever, and a minute all at once. I can picture you in my mind as you were, and as I imagine you are now in Heaven.
It's terribly cold now and snowy, and it seems like no matter how often I go to clear off your name marker, it's always covered in frost and snow. People still manage to find you though and leave things for you so that you know how much you are loved and remembered. Or maybe they do it for us, so that we know we aren't alone in our grief.
Maddy wrote a story about you in school. She wrote about your birth and how excited she was to be a big sister again. It was beautifully written and illustrated. You'd be so amazed by her dancing and how entertaining and charming she is.
Abbey named her new American Girl Doll Isabelle. It's hard sometimes to her your name, but I think it makes her feel connected to you, so I bite my lip to keep from crying. She tells me that she misses you. I picked out her big sister shirt for her to wear to school, but she wouldn't wear it, and I didn't push. She was so proud of that shirt. She was so proud to be your sister, I'm sorry you two didn't get more time together.
Mommy and Daddy are working hard to get things ready for your birthday. More than 100 people have pledged to give blood for your birthday. Dancing Elmos and talking teapots would have been better I know, but I don't have Heaven's mailing addess. I think I will buy your presents anyway.
Daddy wears his pink shirts every Thursday, and now he wears pink whenever he needs you with him. He wore pink to Abbey's first tumbling meet so that you would be there too. His heart is broken and I don't know if it will ever be whole again.
I miss you. Every breath and every step. I think of you often and in everything I do. I try so hard to make your memory a happy one. I tell everyone that I owe it to you to make your life count. Maddy and Abbey will grow up and make their mark on this world in their own time and their own way. You had such a short time, it's my job to make your mark, and carry on the work that your life started. I hope I make you proud. I hope I'm doing this right. I hope that Team Izzy makes a difference, and makes your mark on the world a big one.
I love you my girl. I read the Itsy Bitsy Spider to you this morning, I hope it made you smile.
Always,
Mommy
You're an amazing mother to all three of your children and an inspiration to me. I hope you know how much your family is thought of everyday. Taylor says a prayer every night for sweet Izzy and her friends Maddy and Abbey. It is so sweet and breaks my heart. We all love your family so much!
ReplyDeleteKerri
I have tears in my eyes because no mom should ever go through what you and your family went thru. I know first hand how hard it is to deal with a bleeding disorder. I do not know what it is like to heal from a loss like you have experienced. I will not tell you that everything will be ok, or that she is in a better place..because that is a bunch of fluff and I will not try to sweeten losing your precious perfect daughter. You and your family are in my prayers and thoughts. I do know that Isabelle is with you and she does hear you. Find comfort that she is part of your spirit, just like she would be if she was still physically with you.
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of giving blood on Isabelle's birthday. Do you have something set up that people outside of your area can donate in her name. I would love to get people to do this for her.
~Lori