I have decided to return to college to finally finish my bachelor’s degree. Yes, that’s right, I do not have even the most basic college degree. 8 semesters at WIU and I have nothing to show for it. It has been a constant source of embarrassment for me. But I’ve decided to do something about it.
Like a silly woman, I just up and decided to do this. I filled out my application online as a returning student.
Obstacle one. 17 years ago when I was last registered for classes, I was a moron and they are reluctant to give morons a second chance. I appealed under the New Start program. Sent in a letter with what I hoped was the perfect balance between groveling, and humor and waited.
APPROVED!!!!
I was deemed worthy enough to attend WIU. I had already completed my FAFSA and was optimistic that I would be able to cover my tuition and fees with financial aid. I checked my STARS account religiously and was delighted to find that my preliminary numbers looked like that would be the case. No actual out of pocket expenses for tuition. WOOT!!!
Obstacle two. My account required further verification. 4 years ago someone used my identity to file a fraudulent tax return and collect a large refund. The IRS has been kind enough to put my SSN on a complete lockdown. Meaning that they pretty much pretend I don’t exist anytime someone (even me) tries to access information with my SSN. I’m glad they do this. However, it means that I need correctly answer 17 questions about my life and identity and location and the favorite color of my third grade teacher’s cat in order to access any of my tax information. So you can sure as hell bet that they are having a good laugh when they see a FAFSA confirmation request coming through for my pathetic 39 year old self. I verified my identity to 3 different agents. Sent a request in writing, electronically and through elaborate smoke signals. And I provided the WIU financial aid department with the tax transcript they desired.
I kept checking STARS waiting for my financial aid award letter to appear.
Obstacle three. My academic progress toward my degree was deemed unsatisfactory. This rendered me ineligible for any financial aid. Period. Until I had made satisfactory progress toward graduating. Which I couldn’t do until I took classes. Which I couldn’t do without financial aid. I explained to the financial aid automaton I was emailing that I had been admitted under the New Start program which reset my GPA to 0.0 and allowed me a NEW START.
"LOL. That’s so cute that you think that!" I could hear under her breath over email. Foolish woman that I was, I didn’t understand that the New Start program only applies to your admission and good standing. It is completely irrelevant in regards to everything else. I would have to appeal.
Now. Mind you, this appeal system is designed for students who are appealing in a timely manner from their failings, partying too much, or illness, death in the family etc. They wanted documentation of the reason I provided for failing to have a GPA over 2.0 or having earned 67% of the hours I’ve attempted. These failings of mine were 17 years ago. And they weren't even good failings. I was just an idiot. I barely remember that girl.
So here’s what I typed into that little dialog box, “17 years ago I had a pretty easy job making almost double what people working in the field that my major was. I was getting married and that man promised me I could have babies and stay home and take care of them. I was idiot. Was. I’m not that idiot anymore. I am almost 40 and I have 3 kids and am a single mom. I lost that good paying job and now I have one that just allows me to keep my head above water. I want better for them, so I need to be better for them. I have no documentation of my idiocy aside from my employment history, divorce decree and my willingness to admit my supreme idiocy.” I also copied and pasted my original appeal letter which got me back into the university. I received an email that I would need to take some online life skills classes. I did that. They encouraged me to balance my social life with my study time and if necessary to not hold down a job while attending school.
Finally 2ish weeks ago I received notification that my appeal was granted and that I would have to stick to an academic plan until I met their satisfactory progress criteria, but that I would be eligible to receive financial aid. That's when I started feeling like I might throw up.
I feel a little reckless and crazy taking this on at this stage in my life. I’m about to have a kid in Driver’s Ed and one in kindergarten. The oldest kids combined are in a dozen extra activities. Sometimes (lots of times) I can’t keep up with dishes and laundry and I feel like a failure. So I’m going to throw classwork and studying and tests and reading in there too? I just got the complete set of Game of Thrones books for my birthday. I haven’t finished them yet and I’m just going to table them until I have my degree????? I have this crazy amazing man who I love spending time with. So I’m asking him to trade our lazy weekend time for quizzing me and hanging out with me while I write papers and study. I have no idea what I’m thinking. But I’m hoping I can pull this off. I’m hoping the girls see me and know that their plans and dreams should never take a back seat to anyone else. I’m hoping all 3 see that just because something is hard to get doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep going. And I’m really hoping that when I’m all done I don’t look too much like the Crypt Keeper in my cap and gown. I’m going to really up my moisturizing game.
Like a silly woman, I just up and decided to do this. I filled out my application online as a returning student.
Obstacle one. 17 years ago when I was last registered for classes, I was a moron and they are reluctant to give morons a second chance. I appealed under the New Start program. Sent in a letter with what I hoped was the perfect balance between groveling, and humor and waited.
APPROVED!!!!
I was deemed worthy enough to attend WIU. I had already completed my FAFSA and was optimistic that I would be able to cover my tuition and fees with financial aid. I checked my STARS account religiously and was delighted to find that my preliminary numbers looked like that would be the case. No actual out of pocket expenses for tuition. WOOT!!!
Obstacle two. My account required further verification. 4 years ago someone used my identity to file a fraudulent tax return and collect a large refund. The IRS has been kind enough to put my SSN on a complete lockdown. Meaning that they pretty much pretend I don’t exist anytime someone (even me) tries to access information with my SSN. I’m glad they do this. However, it means that I need correctly answer 17 questions about my life and identity and location and the favorite color of my third grade teacher’s cat in order to access any of my tax information. So you can sure as hell bet that they are having a good laugh when they see a FAFSA confirmation request coming through for my pathetic 39 year old self. I verified my identity to 3 different agents. Sent a request in writing, electronically and through elaborate smoke signals. And I provided the WIU financial aid department with the tax transcript they desired.
I kept checking STARS waiting for my financial aid award letter to appear.
Obstacle three. My academic progress toward my degree was deemed unsatisfactory. This rendered me ineligible for any financial aid. Period. Until I had made satisfactory progress toward graduating. Which I couldn’t do until I took classes. Which I couldn’t do without financial aid. I explained to the financial aid automaton I was emailing that I had been admitted under the New Start program which reset my GPA to 0.0 and allowed me a NEW START.
"LOL. That’s so cute that you think that!" I could hear under her breath over email. Foolish woman that I was, I didn’t understand that the New Start program only applies to your admission and good standing. It is completely irrelevant in regards to everything else. I would have to appeal.
Now. Mind you, this appeal system is designed for students who are appealing in a timely manner from their failings, partying too much, or illness, death in the family etc. They wanted documentation of the reason I provided for failing to have a GPA over 2.0 or having earned 67% of the hours I’ve attempted. These failings of mine were 17 years ago. And they weren't even good failings. I was just an idiot. I barely remember that girl.
So here’s what I typed into that little dialog box, “17 years ago I had a pretty easy job making almost double what people working in the field that my major was. I was getting married and that man promised me I could have babies and stay home and take care of them. I was idiot. Was. I’m not that idiot anymore. I am almost 40 and I have 3 kids and am a single mom. I lost that good paying job and now I have one that just allows me to keep my head above water. I want better for them, so I need to be better for them. I have no documentation of my idiocy aside from my employment history, divorce decree and my willingness to admit my supreme idiocy.” I also copied and pasted my original appeal letter which got me back into the university. I received an email that I would need to take some online life skills classes. I did that. They encouraged me to balance my social life with my study time and if necessary to not hold down a job while attending school.
Finally 2ish weeks ago I received notification that my appeal was granted and that I would have to stick to an academic plan until I met their satisfactory progress criteria, but that I would be eligible to receive financial aid. That's when I started feeling like I might throw up.
I feel a little reckless and crazy taking this on at this stage in my life. I’m about to have a kid in Driver’s Ed and one in kindergarten. The oldest kids combined are in a dozen extra activities. Sometimes (lots of times) I can’t keep up with dishes and laundry and I feel like a failure. So I’m going to throw classwork and studying and tests and reading in there too? I just got the complete set of Game of Thrones books for my birthday. I haven’t finished them yet and I’m just going to table them until I have my degree????? I have this crazy amazing man who I love spending time with. So I’m asking him to trade our lazy weekend time for quizzing me and hanging out with me while I write papers and study. I have no idea what I’m thinking. But I’m hoping I can pull this off. I’m hoping the girls see me and know that their plans and dreams should never take a back seat to anyone else. I’m hoping all 3 see that just because something is hard to get doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep going. And I’m really hoping that when I’m all done I don’t look too much like the Crypt Keeper in my cap and gown. I’m going to really up my moisturizing game.
I for 1 am so proud of you and acnt wait to see you succeed! It's tough working going to school and taking care of the kids but its so worth it. I'm now bored with mine all but gone and I'm here anytime you need help!! You've got this!!
ReplyDelete